Writingコースの流れと事例紹介
Movies1250250500Microsoft
Word
Topic: Movies
I enjoy watching movies in my free time. I like to go to the theater but
I don't have enough time to do so because I have two children and no one
takes care of them except my husband. Our parents live far away from us.
So I watch them on DVDs. I sometimes buy DVDs if I love them very much
and I want to watch them many times. But most of them that I watch are
rent from rental shops.
I love action movies very much especially spy movies like 007 series and
Mission Impossible series. I had never watched romance movies until I
watched Bridget Jones's Diary. It was the first romance movie that I watched.
At first, I crushed on Hugh Grant. He was a great actor. Then I watched
his all movies such as Notting Hill, Two Weeks Notice and About a Boy.
And also I like reading books very much. So I wanted to read "Pride
and Prejudice" because Bridget Jones's Diary was written on the base
of it. The author, Helen Fielding, she loved BBC drama produced "Pride
and Prejudice." The hero of this novel is Mr.Darcy and he was acted
by Colin Firth. So he played the role of Mark Darcy in "Bridget Jones's
Diary."
It was very challenging but I tried to do it. When I finished reading
it, I decided to buy DVD of BBC drama because it wasn't rent in Japan.
If I want to watch it, there's no way to buy it.
It was expensive but I bought it. And then I had no idea but I crushed
on Colin Firth.
If you haven't watched "Pride and Prejudice" produced by BBC,
I highly recommend you to watch it.
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REVIEW:
PARAGRAPH 1
1st sentence ("going to theaters" is much better )
2nd sentence .(Sentence is made up of four subordinating clauses, too
long compound complex sentence)
3rd sentence (It is unclear,do you expect your parents to take care of
your kids?)
PARAGRAPH 2
This sentence is correct but I change it to simpler statements.
But most of them that I watch are rent (the word "rent" must
be omitted because the word "rental shop" is used)
PARAGRAPH 3
I had never watched (present perfect should be used)romance movies (romantic
movies is better)until I watched Bridget Jones's Diary. It was the first
romance movie that I watched.( In this paragraph the tenses don't agree
with each other)
PARAGRAPH 4
1st sentence I crushed on Hugh Grant(have/has/had a crush on is the correct
phrase)
2nd sentence ( word order " all comes before his" his is possessive
pronoun which modifies The word "movies")
EDITED:
Watching movies is what I enjoy in my free time.Going to a theater is
a lot of fun.
I have to take care of my two children so I dont have much time to go
see a movie.
I sometimes have to buy DVDs or rent them from a rental shop.
I am crazy about movies especially the action ones. I love Mission Impossible
and James Bond's movie series.Recently, I watched the movie entitled "
Bridget Jones' Diary". It was such a wonderful romantic movie. I
was not into romantic movies before but watching Hugh Grant in this movie
was absolutely amazing.
I think I had a crush on him the first time I saw him in that movie. I
thought he was such a great actor, he played his role well. I watched
some of his romantic movies like "Notting Hill", "Two Weeks
Notice", and " About A Boy".
I also like reading books very much. I did read the book entitled "Pride
and Prejudice". The movie "Bridget Jones' Diary" was patterned
from it so I love it. The author of the book, Helen Fielding, loved BBC
produced drama " Pride and Prejudice". In the novel, Mr Darcy
is the main character and is acted by Colin Firth. Colin Firth played
the role of Mr.Darcy in the movie "Bridget Jones' Diary". I
read the book and I found it challenging. After I finished reading it,
I decided to buy the DVD copy because I couldn't rent it. The DVD copy
was expensive but I had to buy it. I have a crush on Colin Firth because
of that movie. I’m sure you would love to watch that movie drama, so if
you haven't watched it yet I recommend that you get a copy and enjoy it.
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